I light up about books because I think they're going to make my life better. It isn't a pretentious aversion to my situation but an identification with a higher power: if the feds could've balled NY, the people who hurt me would've been out of the job before the State enforced the law. I understand family inspiring and concerning but I'm used to rejection and abandonment.
Until better curriculi are instituted, I'm determined to attend college for field knowledge. Even if I can't obtain employment, I'll put together DARPA material. Make a gentler train or die trying: these days I'm an effective intellectual at home but am challenged in public.
